Return to Summary

Selected Comments

Question: Should grandparents have a say in how their grandchildren are raised after a divorce?

Answered: No

It's not their child.

I do not think it's really the grandparent's buisness to get involved -- their kids are adults now. I think as long as the children are not being abused the grandparents really have no say in the matter.

Most grandparents don't know what happens inside their grandchildren's house.

No more than usual ... the parents are still the parents.

We're not their kids.

I said no to this, not because I believe that grandparents shouldn't be heavily involved in a child's life, but because many grandparents find it difficult not to become overbearing and eventually trying to raise their grandchildren themselves.

It's not their child.

It is not their choice to decide how children should be raised unless they see that the child or parents are at risk.

That decision should only be between the parents unless one of the grandparents plays a crucial part in the children's lives.

I believe that this is up to the parents to decide.

Grandparents are there to love the grandchild, not parent them.

The parents need to make the decisions for their child.

It's not really up to the grandparents. They are not the parents and it should be the parents' call all the way unless they ask help from the grandparents.

Grandparents might have more experience but they usually don't have full knowledge of what is best for the kids.

No, because it may be their grandchild, but its not their child.

Unless the parents are druggies or something like that, the parents are the ones who are responsible. No matter how irresponsible they are acting.

No, because they should only have a say if the parents are dead. The parents chose to have a child and they need to take care of it by themselves. More input from a 3rd party is just confusing.

No, they are old.

Absolutely not. They just make it worse because they're mad about what happened and they push that on the kids.

They CAN have a say; I mean, they do know their own child best (mom or dad). But they shouldn't have a major part in what the parents decide. I think the kid and his/her needs should have the biggest part in the decision.

Because it just needs to be between mom and dad.

They will try to control the children and make their parent(s) seem like bad people.

The decisions are up to the parents and it's not for other family members to choose what goes on in the kids' lives.

They don't live with the kids, so they get no say.

They aren't the parents. So, they don't get a say unless the parents want them to.

Unless the child could be in danger.

Because it's not their job to instruct what to do.

Well, they aren't their children. They could say something but it could easily be overlooked.

They don't live with the child or see it as much so they don't get a say.

No, grandparents aren't that child's parents. That's simply it. So they don't have any business getting into their children's/grandchildren's business.

Unless they are going to be directly involved in the kids' lives, its not their place to say.

Grandparents could have a say but they should also leaving parenting to the parents unless the child is at risk.

The grandparents already had kids, they don't get a say. It could be just the parents and mostly the KIDS who pick.

They're not my parents.

They didn't raise us ... Why should they want to take part in it now?

It is the parent's choice on how the kid is raised.

Why should they?

They already raised their child. I believe that they should offer suggestions since they have experience but I really don't think that they should have final say.

Its not their kids.

They are not the parents!!!

The children are the parents' responsibility; that doesn't change.

Not unless they were involved most of the time before. The parents should be making the most decisions.

They are a whole different generation, and the parents have grown up differently, so they will have different morales and such on how to live a life.

I would think so. I mean, yeah, they will put their input in there but it's really between the parents and the child. Not unless one of the parents ask for input.

They can offer advice, but I don't believe that they should have a say because they already raised their kids, this is their child's kid.

That's not their life.

They are not the parents and the ultimate responsibility is not on them.

Grandparents are more than a little biased.

They have a say in almost anything ... this is one of them.

They aren't the parents, what do they know?

Grandparents are awesome, but it's between the parents and the child. Unless both parents are just wack...

They are not the parents in the situation, so unless the parents agree the children should go with the grandparents they should have no say in the matter.

Unless they are living with the family, they don't know what is going on in the lives of the family.

Grandparents aren't involved enough in their grandchildrens' lives to know what is best for them

Grandparents are an important aspect of family life, but they should not have a weighted opinion in a grandchild's life before or after divorce. They have had their turn in raising children, so they can help in certain areas but they cannot know what is best for a child when it is not theirs.

Quite simply, they are not the children's mother or father.

The parents made the decision to have kids, how to raise them, and they should be the ones to decide how to raise them after the divorce.

They ain't the parents.

They are grandparents. They should only have a say in it when they are the ones taking care of the child. Only the person taking care of the child and the other parent should have a say in how the child is raised.

Unless the parents are incompetents, the grandparents should allow their children to take care of their own children. The grandparents parts are done in raising children and it is now their children's turn. It's not their problem.

It's up to the parents to raise their kids.

My grandparents and many others' grandparents don't really know what's going on. They can say as much as they want but I don't think they should have a say because ultimately it's the parents' decision.

Because they're just going to want their child to raise the children and be biased in the situation instead of figuring out what's best for the children.

I'll qualify that. Mostly, I think it's up to the parents, but if there's any question of physical, emotional, or verbal abuse, the grandparents should be enabled to step in.

Their children are on their own, they should be mature enough to handle things on their own. But suggestions are not unwelcome.

It changes absolutely nothing. :(

It's their children's choice, not theirs.

The grandparents are just that: grandparents.

I mean, they should have their thoughts respected, but the kids aren't theirs.

They arent the parent, but I will say they do have wisdom that the parent doesn't have. But it doesn't mean they are the ultimate authority.

It's like none of their business.

The child is not the grandparents'.

It ain't their kid.

No, because they are not the parents of the child and it is not their place to interject their wants/desires.

Most of them are senile anyway.

It should be the parent's decision, unless they aren't in a stable position.

It's only between the parents and the kids. Extended family and steprelatives have no business.

It should be about the same as it would be in a normal marriage, obviously, if the kids aren't getting looked after well enough, and the other parent isn't fit to look after them, then the grandparents should be allowed a say in it. But it is not as clear cut as a "yes" or "no" answer, there is always going to be that gray area that some issues stand in and this is one of them.

In most cases children are not, and should not be raised by their grandparents.

It's not the grandparent's responsibility, so no.

It's the parents' decision on how their children are raised.

Grandparents can stay out of it.

I believe that they should offer advice, but they already raised their own children and now it's time for them to just be the grandparent.

Its not their kid. They have the right of free speech but ultimately it should be the kid's choice.

They are not the parents, they should have raised their children well enough that the children will raise their own children properly.

It's not their child.

They are not the parents.